Thursday, June 25, 2009

Toe Jam

The distance from my bedroom door to my bathroom door is approximately eight feet.

This eight feet appears innocent. It is not.

I woke up in the middle of Saturday night and walked that eight feet to the bathroom, half asleep. And about four feet into my journey, I ran into this:

That’s a ladder. A very sturdy, fiberglass and metal ladder. It’s great for reaching high things and I feel very secure getting into my attic with it. However, I do not recommend slamming your foot into it in the middle of the night.

Ouch. That hurt. That really hurt. That really, *really* hurt.
I went back to bed, pain in my foot, thinking I’d have a nasty bruise from an unpleasant toe-stubbing.

The next morning, I stepped out of bed with my right foot, then my left. Soon as the second foot hit the floor, I fell back in bed. Extreme pain. Swelling. Ugly colors beginning to appear.

I sat with ice on it, 20 minutes on, 20 minutes off, and watched Fred Astaire in The Band Wagon. I always forget how pretty Nanette Fabray is and I want about 75% of her wardrobe from this movie. I think I’d look very nice in fluffy skirts.

When the dust settled somewhere late in the day, it became obvious that while the whole foot is bruised and sore, it’s my fourth toe from the big one that’s suffered the most damage.
See? Not so pretty. (P.S. My foot is not fat and I do not have chubby toes. Thats all swelling. And while my camera didnt quite catch it, theres a lovely lilac shade covering most of the top portion of my foot...)

On Monday morning, I debated back and forth on whether to call the doctor. I’ve stubbed my toe before, a lot, and I didn’t want to feel stupid going to the doctor for him to say, duh (he wouldn’t really do that; he’s really very nice).

I waited until after my dentist appointment at noon (to replace temporary fillings with permanent ones) and just from hopping around from half a day, I knew I’d have to call. I did and went to see him at 6:15 on Monday night. He took a quick look and sent me for X-rays, letting me know he’d call with the results the next morning.

On Tuesday morning, wearing my very non-Nanette house slippers as office shoe ware, I listened to his message informing me I had fractured my toe. While he asserted it would most likely just take time to heal, he wanted me to see a foot specialist to be sure.

called to make the appointment with the foot guy, and the schedule lady gave me an appointment one week away. I questioned this, and I am very proud of myself for sticking up and telling her I needed to see him sooner. She transferred me to his physician’s assistant and I left a rattling voice mail. She called me back 10 minutes later to tell me I could see him the next day at 8am.

Wednesday morning and I arrived at the foot guy still wearing my non-Nanette house slippers (which, by the way, are not so good for walking in Chicago alleys). I spent 10 minutes filling out forms. I spent 10 minutes waiting for him. He spent about five minutes with me. He told me my fracture ran vertically from just below the joint down the length of my toe. He said it would hurt for about two weeks. He said it would take about eight weeks to heal completely, and would be swollen for most of that time. He gave me a fabulous sandal to wear so I could stop wearing my non-Nanette slippers.

I’d like to say something witty and wise here to wrap this all up, but really, all I can say is: this sucks.

As always, more to come…


CALpumper said...

Ouch Ouch Ouch Ouch Ouch!!!!!!
Hope you heal Quickly!!!!
Stupid ladder. Why in My Way??!!!

Ouch. Did I say Ouch? Fracture? Ouch. Ok I am overdoing it. Sorry.

Listen lady, you gots to send me your email!!! Link in my Blogger profile. And yeah, you can stalk me. That is so sweet of you. And the first someone has Asked. Love ya for it! ha ha.

Thanks TONS for all your comments. My nephew Rocks. Arabians melt my heart and whatever. :0)

Contemporary Troubadour said...

Yikes!!! Hope you get to rest that foot. So sorry to hear of your mishap -- here's hoping for a speedy recovery and really good pain meds ...

Colleen said...

It even looks like it hurts.
Hope it heals very swiftly!

Alison said...

I'll add another "Ouch" to all those from CAL. Poor you, just thinking about it makes me cringe. Get well soon to your toe.


k2 said...

That SUCKS! Feel better soon my friend. Lots of ice, elevation,and have a martini for pain of course!

PS: Your more of ladylike than I, as I would have been screaming,"F^cK, F^ck, F^ck!"
Kelly K

Lora said...

Thank you for all the sympathy ouches--I really appreciate it! And Kelly, there were many f bombs dropping that night, as well as a few other choice words. I filtered them out in an effort to be rated PG-13.

ninnifur said...

uhh that SUCKS!!

Hope it feels better soon. as soon as you hurt something like that, you realize how much you actually use it! Who knew you used your little toes to walk! haha

Scott K. Johnson said...

Major suckage! I was cringing just reading that story! Ouch!

Caroline said...

Another sympathy ouch coming your way! Oh poor thing! I have this cream that works so awesome for ouchy tired sore and achy bodies called Topricin- it works so great and best of all it is natural! Our whole family uses it...wish I could loan ya some! Way better than relying on oral pain meds- hope you feel better! smilinggreenmom

Jonah said...

I'm wishing you a full and speedy recovery.

Karen said...

Yeow!!! I have sympathy pains in my toe just reading your post. :( I hope it's starting to feel better by now (I was away last week, so I'm playing "Blog Catch-Up)