Avoid Void

So, in preparation for my new-doctor appointment tomorrow, last night I keyed in all my numbers that I had written in my notebook so they made a tidy list on a sheet of paper.

I want to be able to show the doctor that my numbers are high at night, that I have a hard time keeping a cap on them after dinner, and that I’m having to eat less and less (I’m down to one carb unit) in order to keep things even somewhat in check. I’m already pushing the maximum units of Lantus (45-47 each night) I can handle without continuously dive-bombing during the day, so I’m thinking it might be time to work in another insulin at night, before I eat dinner.

Unfortunately, that tidy list doesn’t show a lot of my high-at-night numbers. Not because I don’t have any, but because, as I realized last night, I haven’t been checking my numbers at night.

It’s a case of avoidance, in the worst way. I know the number is going to be high. The high number gives me stress, makes me worry, and there’s not a whole helluva lot I can do at 10pm at night to make it drop (no, I am NOT hitting the treadmill right before bed). So rather than take the test and see the high number, I just don’t test. My tests stop around 7pm, right before I eat dinner. There’s only a handful of numbers that show up around 10pm.

Also, I realized that while I test multiple times a day, I tend to test when I know I’m low, just as a confirmation. I don’t really feel highs, so I don’t think to test at other times of the day. I think I need to start testing two hours after I eat, just to see what’s going on. Do you think testing every 15 minutes for two days is overkill? Just to get a better handle on where my numbers are really at?

So, I’m not sure how much help my tidy list of numbers is going to be when explaining things to the doctor. I can point out the few high numbers from when I did test, and I can point out that I’m not testing at night, but I’m wondering how far that will take me.

It’s an internal medicine doctor I’m seeing tomorrow, but I’m planning on making an appointment with an endo next. Maybe I will try that 15 minutes thing, or at least stop avoiding seeing that high number and actually testing after dinner.

As always, more to come…